Through Your Iris

Iris looked on at the crowd. “There’s no way this many people knew either of them. They were just like each other—recluses.”

“Hermits,” her youngest son chimed in. He was hold tightly to her right hand. Iris looked at all of people around them. She only recognized a few: her daughter, her other son, her brother –in-law and his wife, their children—everyone else there were strangers. Their parents didn’t even show up. Iris took a heavy break as someone else she recognized approached her.

“Ma’am, you’re going to have to come with me.” The blue uniformed man took her arm, pulling her away from Christopher. 

“Be strong, Mom.” He whispered to her as she brushed away from him. Her other children looked on in silence. “And don’t eat any food they offer. That’s how they get your DNA. I saw it on T.V.” This made her smile.

The officer put her in his cop car and drove her across town. She didn’t bother hiding her face. She had already known so much shame. She thought back to the days when her husband would embarrass the family. Marlow was a joke in that town. White trash, people would call them. But they weren’t poor. They lived in a lovely, white, 5 bedroom house. Scott, her husband, had been a surgeon. She loved that job. He was never around. He stayed out most days giving girls new breasts or fixing  noses.

She thought about the weekends when he would rant and rave over how things weren’t right. But they only had to deal with him on the weekends—until a year or so ago. A botched implant cost him his job. This gave him more reason to lash out. His children and wife got the brunt of his frustrations. But community members got it too. This is what gave him such a terrible reputation.

Though, what really pushed him over the edge was what he witnessed one day in town. He had been driving aimlessly around in his old, green Ford. Suddenly he noticed a familiar silhouette.  He saw his oldest son’s six foot something figure in the park after dark. He stopped to watch his son. Kevin was speaking with a friend. Scott knew this fellow. He was a 20 something named Marco who lived in the apartments down town. Kevin and Marco spoke facing each other; he could see their breathe in the bitter October air. Scott saw them both smile then hug. They leaned into each other and kissed gently. Scott threw the truck in gear and fiercely sped off.

He flew home and swung open the screen door; it broke from one of its hinges and hung slightly crooked upon closing. “Iris! Iris!” He entered the kitchen and grabbed her shoulders tightly. “Our boy’s a faggot!”

“What?”

“I saw him! I saw him kissing that Marco kid he hangs out with!”

“What…?” Iris got quiet as she watched her husband trot around whispering.

 “I want him out. I want him out.”

“No, Scott!”

“Raise your voice to me?” He snarled at her as he approached. He tore and her blond, wavy hair keeping it fisted between his fingers. He held her head low as he spoke. “You don’t talk to me that way.”

“Okay. . .” Iris whimpered. He released her.

“Mom?” Kevin quietly entered. “The door’s broken.”

“Out!” Scott stormed him. “Out! Out! Out! Get the fuck out! I don’t want your faggot ass in my house ever again!”

“D-dad! I—“ Kevin stumbled over words, not knowing how to respond.

“Just get out! No child of mine is a fag!” Kevin decided not to resist. Scott grabbed him by his trench coat threw him onto the porch. The splintered wood cut his back and left arm. Scott then violently kicked him in the stomach and face over and over and over until finally Kevin cried out.

“STOP IT! STOP IT!” Tears and blood stained his face and the wood around him. “I’m going… I’m leaving…” Kevin stood wobbly and limped away. Iris pushed past Scott and threw her arms around her son.
            “Kevin… I’m so sorry… I love you, baby…” She wiped blood from his nose and lips.

“If you really did, you would’ve stopped him…” Kevin turned away and quickly disappeared in the darkness.

“Fuck you, Scott!” Iris’s sorrow turned to rage. “Why did you do that?!”

Without words, Scott retreated to the house. Iris jerked the door, but it didn’t budge.  She slumped down crying.

“Alrighty, Mrs. Marlow.” The cop’s voice broke her thoughts. “Come with me please.” They brought her inside and sat her at a little table with a glass of water and plate of crackers on it. She thought about the DNA thing her son had told her. She didn’t touch either. A stout cop with a mustache that reminded Iris of Heineken beer sat in front of her.

“Mrs. Marlow,” he began.

“Please,” she interrupted, “Iris.”

“Iris…” He seemed peeved. “Iris, were you close with your son?”

“I loved him.”

“That’s not an answer.”

“I used to be very close to him. Now I only speak with him occasionally. Well,  I used to…” She looked at her hands. She had small cuts on her skinny, slightly crooked fingers. “He would call me sometimes and tell me about things going on. He never asked me for money. I wished he had sometimes. He never asked for anything. He just wanted to tell me things.”

“When was the last time you spoke with him?”
“June 20^th.”

“Two days before?”

“Mmhm. He was very cold sounding. I figured he was depressed again. He’s been quite miserable lately. He’s been struggling with a few illnesses. Plus, he’s hurt over his father.” The officer prompted her to continue. “He and his father had a strange relationship ever since they were young. Kevin never wanted to be around him, but I didn’t know why. Finally, Kevin told me Scott was hurting him; although, he never said how he was being hurt.” Iris glanced her feet. Her tiny purple shoes glistened in the dim light. “Then Scott found out about Kevin’s sexual orientation. He kicked him out at sixteen years old. Kevin was such a sweet boy abused by a harsh world. He was suffering here, officer.”

“You knew he wanted to commit suicide?”

“Y-yes.”

“And you let him?” The cop pushed.

“I had to. How could you keep a person you love away from the only thing that can help him?”

“You’re a sick woman.”

“I just wanted my son to be happy again! He’s been miserable his whole life! His kind of heart cannot handle this world! You just don’t understand! I’m a good mother! I wanted my son to be free!” she continued ranting her innocence as the police took her away. They put her in a holding cell until she calmed down.

“What about Scott?” The cop asked her. “Did you kill him to protect your son? That’s what happened, isn’t it?” He pushed her further.

“No! I loved Scott even though I hated him!” Tears streamed down her face. “His letter said he wanted to go before he caused more trauma to his children. He loved us too. He just didn’t know how.”

“From this letter, he knew how to love your children…” A cop standing back mumbled. Iris picked up on his comment.

“How dare you!” she spat,” I  would’ve done anything to prevent the pain they felt! I don’t want my


 children to hurt. . .” She wept, and the police left her in the cell. They all walked away making 


note of her story. They all seemed unsure what would happen to her other three children. They 


weren’t sure what to do at all. Things for the Marlows can’t ever be the same as they used to.


 Everything has changed.